Single ≠ Alone

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Image Courtesy of I May Not Know Much

Unfortunately, thanks to romantic comedies and our families constantly hounding us about when we’re going to get married (thanks to my wonderful family for not doing that), being single still gets a bad rap. Last summer I wrote a blog about the stigma of being single but even without that stigma, I realized there was a part of the idea of being single that I still had wrong.

Being single is not only looked at as being the lesser status in life oftentimes, it’s also used synonymously with terms like “alone” or “lonely.” We assume that just because we’re not in a relationship with someone that we must be lonely right?  Because I don’t have someone to share my life with right now, certainly I can’t be content and must feel lonely.

Don’t get me wrong, I definitely do have those days where I feel lonely. I think we all do. But people in relationships can feel that way too. I know when I was in my last serious relationship I was the loneliest I’d ever been. Loneliness isn’t a feeling just reserved for the unattached.

So that brings me to this Wayne Dyer quote. We can’t be lonely if we like the person we’re alone with: ourselves. If you love yourself, heck, if you even just like yourself, then why not like spending time with yourself? I don’t know about you, but I think I’m a pretty cool person to spend time with and some days there’s nothing I love more than eating a meal by myself, having a solo shopping day or even a solo movie day.

Even with my “me” time aside, I am the furthest thing from alone in life. I have great parents I get to see often. I have great friends and great coworkers that I do so many fun things with. Maybe I don’t have date night with my boyfriend or get to go on romantic getaways with my partner but I still have fun Saturday nights and I still get to travel to a lot of great places.

So in my dictionary, “single” and “alone” are two very different words that really have nothing to do with each other. You can make the choice how you feel, no matter what your relationship status is and I choose happy and fulfilled and definitely not…alone.

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One thought on “Single ≠ Alone

  1. I agree 100% Jackie. You’re just starting your adult life and you have all the time you want to, to experiment. You’re in your early 20’s, Me I’m 58, not that I can’t be a Father, but all of a sudden a single man in his 50’s is in high demand. If I come across someone who I’m compatible with, who is to decide if marriage is the rite move. Me, that’s who. If me being happy and satisfied needs marriage to prove it, I’m the one, not society as a whole….Being honest with ones self is what is top priority. How can one love and be honest with another, if you can’t be open and honest with yourself…

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