An Open Letter to the Word “Should”

Dear “Should:”

I’ve decided this relationship is no longer working for me. It’s not you, it’s me. I’ve decided I no longer want to live my life under your boundaries. I no longer want my worth to be tied to you. Other people think I need to stay with you…fit into this societal box we’re all supposed to fit into. You think I need to be in a relationship. That the path of my life has to lead to marriage and kids. But I hate to inform you that I don’t think any of those are really in the cards for me. Not now and maybe not ever. You keep wanting to put all these restrictions on me and make me feel bad about myself. Telling me I need to look and act a certain way. So that’s it, I’m ending things for good. I’m going to live my life for me and no one else…including you. I wish I could say it’s been fun, but really it just hasn’t. I’m returning all of your things and baggage. Goodbye should…have a nice life.

Sincerely,

Jackie

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2 thoughts on “An Open Letter to the Word “Should”

  1. Hello again Jackie,

    My apologies I did not introduce myself in the previous post. I am Yeranui and I am a Loma Linda student in the Occupational Therapy program. You’re probably going to be bombarded by our posts this week, haha. I also wanted to mention another idea that just popped into my head, I feel like we plant these “should”s in our heads. If hear from all around how a woman should act, dress, look, behave, etc. The ones that we hear the most of and have a greater impact on us are the ones that we slowly but surely adapt. Those “should”s accepted by our subconscious then turn into “has to”s. I hope that makes sense. Most of the time we don’t even realize that we do this, why? Because it is all happening within the subconscious, at least that’s what I believe to be so.

    1. Hi Yeranui. What a great point you make! That things start off as shoulds because of all the things we see on a daily basis and are bombarded with and then we start accepting them as has to’s without even realizing it. It’s amazing the impact that societal standards, TV, movies, ads, magazines and all those things can have on us. Thanks so much for the comment!

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