So here’s the thing about having MD (and why I get so upset when something else goes wrong with me health-wise). I was already born with a big health issue; something I have to deal with on a daily basis. Something that causes me pain (especially when I fall twice in a few day span). Something that can be mentally and emotionally trying. All of us who have MD in its various forms have already paid our health dues just by being born with it, so we should never get anything else other than a cold or a flu here or there (and even that can be potentially life threatening for some).
So even though my thyroid stuff may just be hypothyroidism which a lot of people have and is easily treatable, it’s still one more health/wellness thing I would have. I had to have pre-cancerous cells removed several years ago. I had to go to the ER after a car accident. I feel like I’ve fulfilled my quota.
I often think about to the post I did about Tig Notaro a while back. She wasn’t born with MD but talk about paying your medical issue dues. Whenever I feel like my health stuff is too much to handle, I try to think about her and how incredibly brave she was in dealing with the shitty hand she was dealt. It doesn’t always make me less upset about whatever new health issue I’m dealing with, but it certainly helps to put it in perspective.
I know I can seem overdramatic and overworrisome about things like my thyroid ultra sound and all that so I thought it was worth illuminating why I am that way. I know I am still extremely lucky because many people with MD and other physical disabilities have many many health problems as a result of their disability. I’m fortunate that none of the ones I’ve had thus far are as a result of my MD (except my ever-increasing back problems and bruised knees). But I also can’t help that it wears me out sometimes, always having something to deal with. I wish that all of us born with any kind of physical/health challenge could have an automatic cap that our bodies would turn on that meant we would never have any other health issues ever again other than the big one we were born with. What a wonderful thing that would be.
But until that day, just have to find a way to keep my chin up and move forward.