On 2019

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As I’ve gotten older, I’ve become less and less interested in making New Year’s resolutions and starting off the year with all of these goals and things I want to achieve. I like the idea of it a lot. A fresh start. A new year to be better and do better. But ultimately, year after year, we fall back into our usual patterns. We break our healthy eating. We stop going to the gym (or in my case, have never gone to begin with). We don’t achieve all of the resolutions we made. Which is totally ok. It’s completely normal to get caught back up in the day to day and forget all of that stuff. I even tried setting more realistic goals but usually faltered on those too.

2018 was a beyond-challenging year. I want to say it’s the worst year I’ve ever had but a) that sounds really over dramatic, and b) I can’t even remember further back than last year anyway so it’s quite possible I had a worse year somewhere back there. Once I started at my new job, things took a huge upturn too.

So for 2019, I’m just trying to start the year off with hope. I hope 2019 is just a year. Ideally a steady one with not a lot of change that doesn’t involve me falling all the time. I hope I keep reading a lot. I hope I continue to spend time with friends and maybe even make some new ones. I hope I have the best first trip to the UK. I hope I can have some peace and not be as down as I was for almost all of 2018.

Maybe it’s going to be a great year and maybe it’s not. All I can do is hope.

photo credit: Junior Henry. New Year’s fireworks via photopin (license)

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